When I was a kid, I had a FANCY room. My double bed (that I shared with my sister), was adorned in a yellow Holly Hobbie bedspread my Mom had purchased from the Pottery Barn Kids of our time: JCPenney.
She even went through the pains of painting the walls yellow.
It was straight up tricked out in a very 1980’s kind of way.
Which is the same type of way I hope my children’s rooms are decorated.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve dreamt of creating bedrooms for my children that Pottery Barn would want to copy and use in their next catalog and of DIY projects that would be pinned on Pinterest thousands of times over.
But, here’s the thing. A few weeks ago we had some beautiful weather. I seized the opportunity to roll out three-foot-wide paper for my children to paint on on our back deck. For the better part of two hours they delightedly created masterpieces. My eight-year-old’s masterpiece featured his personally developed initial-superhero-slogan complete with his brother’s muddy footprints on it. When his paint was dry, he begged me to allow him to hang his creation on his bedroom wall using two-and-a-half inch, blue paint tape. I hesitated, knowing it would be a full-wall mural, but relented due to the joy on his face. It’s his wall.
And I want it to stay his wall.
He’s happier decorating with his carefully-designed-personal-logo-on-muddy-footprint-paper than he would be if I dropped thousands of dollars and countless hours creating my idea of utopia for him. [Tweet This]
Beyond having cute stuff, I need to give myself the space to love my precious people. If I give them adorable stuff, and they in turn use it to help me clean the toilet, I might feel angry. I could find them ungrateful and disrespectful when they don’t respect all the thought and work I put into their space. When I relinquish some control and keep things simple, I have the opportunity to admire their wonder and creativity and I have less to worry about or take personally.
While growing up I didn’t know anyone with a room nicer than my own, I do remember seeing movies where girls had canopy beds and matching white furniture, and I never envied them. I was thankful for my room because my mom didn’t ask me any questions when I decided to tastefully decorate my yellow walls with posters of Kirk Cameron from my Teen Bop magazines. My room was my space to express my interests (however shallow). The perfect princess bedroom could have complicated things.
If you, like me, are rethinking what makes a child’s bedroom great, I’m sharing all the tips I have so far.
Five Ingredients to a Rockin’ Kid’s Bedroom
1. Clean, Warm or Cheerful Paint on the Walls
2. As Much Open Space as Possible for Play
3. Safe Bed with Simple Bedding According to Child’s Individual Taste
4. Remove all Danger (Lead Paint, Rusty Items, Sharp Items…)
5. Allowance for Child to Make Reasonable, Unique “Improvements”
That’s it. Because, as I relinquish control, I’m free to appreciate my child’s creativity. And he knows I support his individuality.
He knows I enjoy him.
That’s far better than being featured in any catalog.
(This post originally ran on Coffee Colored Sofa)
About the author: Nicole is a parent of four boys through both birth and foster care adoption. She blogs over at Coffee Colored Sofa where she shares her story of how parenting is changing her.
