Making Memories Is Great But Clean Your Damn House Already

Wannabee BLUNT
Written by Wannabee BLUNT

There’s been a string of articles floating around the world of mom blogs lately about how cleaning our houses shouldn’t be a priority. Apparently, us moms (and dads) are too busy raising our children and drinking wine to be bothered enough to pick up a broom. One of my friends even has a wooden plaque in her house that states, “Excuse the mess, life is happening here.”

That’s all well and good, but who is going to clean your house while you are “making memories?”

Laundry doesn’t do itself. Are you going to send your kid to school in his dirty underpants? I mean really, c’mon. You don’t want him being “that kid” at school do you? You know the one I’m talking about! The “stinky kid” that every school seems to have. His/her mom probably didn’t do the laundry ever either.

What about the dishes? Is it really that god damn hard to put your used coffee mug in the dishwasher? Or can you not be bothered to open the door of the dishwasher, pull out the rack, set it on said rack, and then close the door? When it’s full, you run it. It’s quite simple.

There are some cleaning chores that are quite tedious I get it – like, vacuuming. All of the fucking attachments…why are there so many? I don’t use half of the ones on mine. This isn’t one you have to do every single day, but it is probably one of the most effective. There’s nothing that makes my house feel cleaner than sucking up all of the dog hair and crumbs my kid left from his afternoon snack off of the floor. Nothing says clean like fresh vacuum tracks across the carpet! Basically, if your house looks like the realtor just went through and got it ready for a showing, you are set.

I’m not trying to make you messy types feel bad! Hey, I’m a mom, I get it that life gets busy and sometimes chores slip away from you. But, I really feel like a bunch of moms use their busy lives as an excuse to make themselves feel better about having a trashy house.

Then you ask not to be judged when company comes over because your house is filthy. If you invite me over and ask me to sit on the couch where your baby barfed an hour before and you couldn’t bother to clean it up – I am going to judge you! Clean that shit up!

Febreze really can be your friend.

You want to offer me a drink? Yes, of course I’ll have a glass of wine. But, when you hand me the glass with someone else’s Chapstick stains on it don’t be surprised when I gag. Again, clean that shit up!

I’m not saying your house has to be immaculate. Ain’t nobody got time for that! However, it really isn’t that hard to use a mop, or to change the cat’s litter so your house doesn’t smell like the local animal shelter, or dust that shelf where you proudly display your family photos once in a while! It really is not that difficult.

Your friend will feel more comfortable at your house if her ass doesn’t stick to the dining room chair because you couldn’t be bothered to clean up the spilled juice from last night’s dinner.

From a mom that takes the time to clean her house almost daily, and a friend that is secretly disgusted by certain levels of nastiness – clean your damn house. Do it when you get the chance. Don’t neglect your kids to do it. Live your life. Make messes. Dirty dishes.

But, when all of the fun is done, clean it up.

 

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About the author

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.

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5 Comments

  • So true. I don’t actually understand how anyone can function in a dirty house. It drives me crazy. Don’t get me wrong, my home is definitely not realtor-ready (i.e. there are toys everywhere) but I generally try to keep the floors at least swept and the bathrooms cleaned.

  • Hilarious. Love it. Don’t blame you for posting anonymously-someone somewhere is going to get their feelings hurt and you will be called something ending in -ist but I loved it.

  • Yes!! I have so many friends that are dirty slobs, I cannot understand how they live that way and raise their kids in that environment? I hate going over to their houses or letting my kids play there. It’s really not that friggen hard to keep your house in some kind of order… thanks for writing this!