So It Is Me That is the Nasty One?

Wannabee BLUNT
Written by Wannabee BLUNT

I never knew I was a nasty woman. I am pretty certain I didn’t start out this way.

But there was the father who cheated on my mother and got another woman pregnant. He didn’t pay any child support.

There was the boy who climbed into my bed after a party and tried to have sex with me after I had already vomited 3 crap beers. Such a romantic.

Oh, and there was the guy who garroted me into an alley way and beat my head upon the pavement. Good times!

There were the men who followed me over the bridge who said, ” If you push her in the bushes, I’ll get her panties off.” Just joking, of course.

There was the boyfriend who cheated on me with my best friend. So kind.

And there was abortion doctor who shamed me while my legs were in stirrups. Such a humanitarian.

There was the man who beat me. There was the judge who told me from his big, omniscient bench that I imagined the abuse and did not need a protection order.

There was the gentleman who said I would have the perfect body if I just got rid of that little bit of cellulite near my ass.

There were the men who said, “ I don’t mind sleeping with you but I am not looking for a relationship.”

Oh, and let’s not forget the one who told me he cheated on his wife because she wouldn’t have sex with him.

Then there was the kind obstetrician who spoke to my husband like I wasn’t in the room.

There was the boss at the bakery job who said, ”Oops close quarters..” when he rubbed himself against me. Apparently, he just couldn’t wait for me to get out of the way, repeatedly.

And all those man-splainers who think a woman of 49 needs to have her opinion revised by their vomit of verbiage.

Yes. Sure. I am a nasty woman.

 
About the author: Karin Schott is a bookseller, librarian, writer who lives in central Maine. Follow her on her website, on Facebook and on Twitter

About the author

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.

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6 Comments

  • That was awful…
    What about that dad that picked me up when I crashed my bike into the rose bushes, or the husband that held me as I cried after having my second miscarriage, or the uncle who took me to my first baseball game and taught me to ride his horses. Just because there are nasty people in the world, isn’t an excuse to take on that same mantel, especially if we realize we are doing it. There are also wonderful people and dare I say…. wonderful men in this world.

    • Thank you for your response.

      I wrote the piece in response to a comment made in our political realm that has taken on a lot of traction. Yes, there are good men in the world. This piece is not meant to discount this. My own life experience also has routinely been confronted with overt and covert sexism and misogyny. An experience I think many women can relate to.

      I’ve been thinking about this recently because if there is one benefit from this whole sordid election it is that women are sharing the stories of how this manifests in their own lives. It brings the conversation of gender bias, abuse, assault and the subtle power imposed in our daily interactions with men into the mainstream which I hope is a conversation that leads to change.

      • Amy is right-that was awful and hard to read. And hopefully more people will view it as awful rather than laughing it off with the whole ‘boys will be boys’ line. I completely get your point. I have 2 dads, 6 brothers, a wonderful husband and many other wonderful men in my life. I have also come up against the others you describe and it can leave you feeling disgusted and for some reason dirty, ashamed and scared. Scared of other people’s reactions if you speak up. Thank goodness the world is changing and this is becoming unacceptable. I don’t want the truly wonderful men to be tarred with the same brush. Thought-provoking piece. Hold onto the good ones ladies!

    • Claudia,

      Thank you. What’s the phrase? Tough Broad? I have met good men. These featured in this piece span 49 years of life. I know some of my experiences are unique to my life and mostly happened when I was much younger, naive and at a time when some of this was much more common. When we think about the fact that one candidate’s misogyny has been expressed over his entire life it is not difficult to imagine that this is still common for many women.

  • No. You are not nasty. You are a woman with a brain and an opinion and noone has the right to put you down. Physical or mentally. Keep on keeping on, sister.