An Open Letter To My Bellybutton

Wannabee BLUNT
Written by Wannabee BLUNT

I see you there, constantly judging me. Your little frowny face replacing the once pleasantly surprised one you used to wear. A constant grumpy cat residing directly above my nether regions… What the fuck bellybutton?

Ok, so it’s been two years since I delivered my last baby. Ok, so I have put on a few pounds since becoming a stay at home mommy last January. What are you so grumpy about? It’s not as though you are hanging over the top of my pants yet in a muffin like state. True, you’re not as pleasant to look at as you once were.  You may slightly resemble an elderly person who has lost  his/her dentures, but keep in mind that you’ve been through a lot. You were stretched to the limit.  I get it. For the most part you bounced back pretty well after baby one… the years post number two have been a little slower going, but things could be worse.  Cheer up, will ya?

Why do you have to give me that disapproving look; glaring at me in the mirror each day? I see you sneaking your two cents in during the seconds of face time while slipping on a shirt. I see  your grimace reflected in the mirror, peering beneath layers of cami and cotton when my shirt’s a little too snug. That cami is there in order to keep your smug little mug hidden better, but it doesn’t always do the trick, does it?

I hear you beckoning to me.  Instead of Andy Ackerman’s jovial, “Heellllooo… la la la” from “The Voice” episode of  Seinfeld, I hear a more Eeyore-esque voice saying, “End of the road. Nothing to do, and no hope of things getting better.” The situation is not that dire, bellybutton. We’ve already begun the road to transformation, and though it is a long one, a painful one, a less delicious one, we have already lost the extra, extra 10 pounds we had gained. We are now back down to our “old” heavy weight, and there is hope in sight. Let’s give it an ol’ Gru, “I’m about to do something very, very big,” and work together on this one, shall we?

I’m going to need your support more now than ever, my friend. Like it or lump it, we are in this together, and a Negative Nancy never helped anyone. So let’s turn that frown upside down; a mom could really use at least an encouraging smirk now and then, ya know?

About the author: Patricia Wood is an educator since 2004, but now finds herself as a stay at home mom of her two toddler daughters. Happily married, she spends her time chasing her girls and recently her dreams of becoming a writer, all while trying to be a stellar wife and “fly” mom. There are successes and failures, and a lot of 90’s rap. Please join her in keeping it real at: https://prettyflyforawhitemom.wordpress.com.

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Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.

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