I’ll admit I have a problem with receiving suggestions from anyone. If you have a suggestion for how I can overcome this, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF (see what I did there?).

I realize that this doesn’t make me saint material, or even friend material in some circles, but at least I’m self aware, right?

Let me be clear: if I say ‘I can’t find any organic almond butter for a reasonable price’ and you suggest a store where you have found it, we don’t have a problem. I am talking about the suggestions that start with, or have an implied ‘You know what your problem is?’ and how that usually revolves around parenting or parenting responsibilities.

“You need to stop feeding your son until he eats vegetables. If he is hungry enough, he’ll eat them.”

“If you let them stay up later, they will sleep later.”

“You just need to prioritize and then you won’t feel so overwhelmed.”

“Our kids drank 2% milk. That’s all they need. You don’t need to give them whole milk.”

“She’s old enough to be potty trained.”

“It’s simple, just take away the pacifier.”

blah blah screen time.”

blah blah blah nap time.”

blah blah blah time outs.”

LeBron James was the straw that broke this camel’s back. 

Okay, let me explain (poor guy).

A few days ago I received an email from Twitter that read ‘Twitter has suggestions for you!’.

Twitter, helpful friend that it is, thought that my life would be better if I followed Conan O’Brien, We Dem Boyz and yes, LeBron James.

Now, I follow a handful of entertainers, so I guess I could see Conan being on there. I had to Google We Dem Boyz — apparently Wiz Kahlifa’s page. I follow a few musicians, so I guess that’s another (very big) stretch, but LeBron James?

Twitter, do you know me at all???

Other than a few relationships with sports abusive boyfriends in the past (yes, that’s the thing where you call ‘uniforms’ ‘outfits’ in mixed company and are banished to the hole for a week), I can’t find any tie between me, anything I like and Lebron James.

Then, like a basketball to the head, it hit me. Those unsolicited life advisors are like Twitter with their sub-par LeBron James-worthy suggestions. (No offense (pun intended) LeBron.) They take the very tiny bit that they know about me, add in a bunch of random data that has nothing to do with me, and then lump it all together to make their magical suggestion.

So instead of getting defensive the next time I hear or read a suggestion that has no possible application in my life, I won’t put effort into justifying why it won’t work for me. I will listen politely and say to myself “It’s just not for me.”

Who knew LeBron could help me out so much with guilt and empowerment? I’m gonna go follow him now. I feel I owe it to him. Go Lakers! Or something.

Oh, and leave a comment. I said comment, NOT suggestion. Thank you.

By Susan Maccarelli
Blogger at http://www.peckedtodeathbychickens.com/
On Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/peckedtodeathbychickens
On Twitter at https://twitter.com/Peckd2Death

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Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.

18 Comments

  1. Pingback: Everything I Know About Unsolicited Parenting Advice I Learned From Lebron James | Pecked to Death By Chickens

  2. Ha! So funny. I’m also very V bad with suggestions, er advice of almost any kind (except where to buy almond butter perhaps). And I hate, most of all, unsolicited parenting advice. Blah blah sleep/naps/nursing/eating indeed!
    -Dana (who is not on Twitter which might be for the best)

    • Stay away from Twitter! There are probably times I absolutely SHOULD take advice but I am so put off by the way it is given, I can’t do it. Part of it is other people and part of it is the fact that I can’t take anything that even hints of criticism – alas.

  3. Funny stuff! In your example, I think I’m your husband and my sister is you. I have a tendency to give her advice she doesn’t want (my excuse is that I’m older and wiser :)). So I will say “What Twitter, LeBron James and Susan” taught me about unsolicited advice, and try not to give her so much. I know she will thank you! Have a great weekend!

    • Oh Tammy – I like you even better knowing this. The reason I know WK is because A) I watch Fashion Police B) His girlfriend, Amber Rose, is often featured for the sausage casings and weird outfits she wears and he is almost always photographed with her. I am not proud of any of this, but in that case Twitter was on their game a little.

  4. I have the same problem as you when the advice starts with those words. Know what beats unsolicited parenting advice though? Unsolicited parenting advice from people who have NO kids at all! Been there, had it happen to me, got the shirt and all that jazz!

    • Oh geez. I agree, but I will admit that I WAS that person who was all ‘I’ll never let my kids do x’ BEFORE I had kids. I certainly never gave advice though — just judged quietly from afar.

  5. Ha! I love it. I must admit I am terrible at cordially receiving advice! No one likes to think they are wrong. I think it is great advice to suggest;: its just not for me. Thanks for the advice (wink, wink) 🙂

  6. Loved this. There should be a “relate so hard” button. Definitely having a kid brings out the advisors. As someone who’s always had random strangers shout “Smile” at me—Why?—I thought I’d be prepared. My favorite was a friend’s husband who when I joked about how my daughter never sleeps basically said it was because I dropped the ball (staying w/ basketball theme 😉 ) w/ sleep training. What’s that now?

  7. I WILL give you a suggestion: I think you should pat yourself on the back for an awesome post! (see what *I* did there?) lol

    But, seriously, though, I heard LeBron is pretty funny on social media. There is actually an app dedicated to keeping people updated on his tweets and such. (But LeBron shuts everything down during the playoffs, I hear, in the interest in staying focused.)

    Happy memorial Day weekend!

    • Hmmm – maybe LeBron is hilarious and Twitter thinks I am hilarious and thus they tried to set us up? I’ll go with that theory for now.

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