I was discussing my oldest daughter’s choice of dress-up clothes with someone recently. When hearing Yoda, the loveable green character from Star Wars, was her top pick, I was met with “Doesn’t that bother you?”
Now, I’m not entirely sure where all this question was leading, but I replied with a resounding, “No.”
In fact, I was more than happy for her to pick something “out of the norm” for her age and gender to dress up in. What the hell is “normal” anyway? I knew Yoda was her top choice, and it was not available when we did the family outing to the nearest holiday store. So both she and my youngest picked Sophia costumes. Super cute, very fun, but honestly I was a little bummed. I knew that they were overwhelmed by the large wall of choices, and I knew that my oldest’s greatest wish was found unfulfillable by this tremendous selection, and so she just picked something. My youngest followed her lead, and picked the same. Easy, yes.
Then on a weekly outing to the local Wal-mart, we were doing our usual perusal of all the holiday decorations, and lo and behold, there he was in all his robed and green hatted glory, a costume in just the right size of Yoda for my eldest. And what was to accompany it? A garden fairy of course, with sparkly wings and glittery skirt. The girls were beside themselves with glee at these new costumes, and so it was a no brainer that the others would go back, and these would be this year’s choice.
My daughter, who is 3 ½ years old, loves Yoda. She loves to play with her lightsaber and watch Star Wars because her Daddy likes it too. She loves to pretend to put on makeup and princess dresses, not because Daddy likes to, but Mommy does. She also loves to pretend to fix her Frozen Jeep like Daddy. She also loves rocks. That’s not from either Mommy or Daddy, the girl just digs rocks. Pun intended.
Without a doubt, my daughter’s likes seem influenced by those around her, mainly my husband and I, as we are the biggest influences in her life at the moment, but in no way am I bothered by any of them.
I think we are all aware of the idiocies that some people believe about what may be the result of my daughter being interested in or playing with things deemed “improper” by archaic societal standards for her. But I can honestly say that I will love my daughter wholeheartedly no matter where life takes her or in what her interests may lie. She’s my daughter, that’s all that matters, and I will defend her choices to the best of my ability. To those who are ” bothered” by such things, I think Yoda says it best in The Empire Strikes Back, “That is why you fail.”
About the author: An educator since 2004, Patricia now finds herself as a stay at home mom of her two toddler daughters. Happily married, she spends her time chasing her girls and recently her dreams of becoming a writer all while trying to be a stellar wife and “fly” mom. There are successes and failures, and a lot of 90’s rap. If you like what you read you can also check out her blog at https://prettyflyforawhitemom.wordpress.com.