Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.
Our Awesome Authors
An amazing collection of bright women who somehow manage to work, play, parent and survive and write blog posts all at the same time. We are the BLUNTmoms, always honest, always direct and surprising hilarious.
Ok fine, we'll begrudgingly admit it. Sometimes people write great posts and don't run them on BLUNTmoms. But there's no reason why we can't share the content later, right? BLUNTGuests brings you some of the funniest, saddest, most heartwarming content from the internet that you might not have seen during its first run.
Our Editor-in-Chief Magnolia Ripkin is sort of like your mouthy Aunt who drinks too much and tells you how to run your life, except funny... well mostly funny... like a cold glass of water in the face. She writes a flagrantly offensive blog at Magnolia Ripkin Advice Blog answering pressing questions about business, personal development, parenting, heck even the bedroom isn't safe.
She is the Editor in Chief at BluntMoms. Other places to find her: Huffington Post, The Mighty and Modern Loss. You can also check her out in two amazing compendiums of bloggers who are published in “I Just Want To Be Alone.” And most recently, Martinis and Motherhood, Tales of Wonder, Woe and WTF
Anne usually speaks in memes and SAT words, and she frequently attempts to explain the laws of physics and high school chemistry according to the kitchen via her home blog FoodRetro. If you want to know why ice melts or pretzels turn brown, and you want to make food that you never imagined could be made from scratch in the process, she's your blogger. Her friends describe her as "hilarious when you get to know her," but it could be that they are just amused by the way she gets riled up when reading the paper. She can also be found playing the part of community editor and grammar nazi here on BLUNTmoms.
Lynn Morrison is a smart-ass American raising two prim princesses with her obnoxiously skinny Italian husband in Oxford, England. If you've ever hidden pizza boxes at the bottom of the trash or worn maternity pants when not pregnant, chances are you'll like the Nomad Mom Diary. Catch up with her daily on Facebook and Twitter.
Tara is gainfully employed by the toughest 3 female bosses she has ever had (well except for that one accounting manager who hated her). The pay sucks, but the cuddles are awesome. She drinks a lot of coffee, uses humour as a defense mechanism, and lives in fear of what lurks in her backyard. Keep Tara company on her unfortunately-named blog Don’t Lick the Deck, where she talks about her husband Nerdguy; her 10 year old and twin 8 year old girls; parenting autism and ADHD; and her inability to shop without creating disaster.
She is regular contributor to Parentdish.ca who have not yet filed a restraining order.
Brooke Takhar is a Vancouver-based mama to one goon and busy body to all. She loves the Internet, glittery nail polish, over-sharing and teaching her kid outdated dance moves. If you really love her, you'll fight in public.
A mom who knew there had to be more than an overwhelming suburban life filled
with good jobs and soccer practices, Julie swept her family off onto a small island in
BC to start over! Craving a life of fulfillment she blogs about facing fears and courageously going after your dreams!
She believes that if you do something, you should do it fully: eat butter, sweat hard and laugh till you pee. Julie’s blog is filled with stories of how her family adapts and continues to strive for a fulfilled life… while enjoying a few perks along the way!
Angila has been writing since 1979 when she received her first diary, filling it with boy crazy nonsense and girly drama.
It wasn't until the 21st century that she discovered writing was a healing tool to release inner chaos.
When Facebook was invented Angila, who is an attention whore reveled in receiving likes and shares. Comments started pouring in that she should write a book.
Knowing her lack of follow through and commitment issues, Angila ignored the advice and chose to blog.
Detached From Logic is where she currently vomits her creative juices and allows the voices in her head a digital soap box.
Her life long dream of having fans came when wordpress announced she had one follower. Unlike the stalkers in her life this one felt acceptable and welcomed.
When she’s not spooning her kids on the couch, complaining about the crunchiness of the kitchen floor, or perfecting her towel folding skills, former teacher, Shannon Day can be found cocktail-shaking and story- making over at her site: Martinis & Motherhood. There she ponders the meaning of life, while poking fun at her hot hubby. Shannon is co-founder of Tipsy Squirrel Press and co-editor of Martinis & Motherhood: Tales of Wonder, Woe & WTF?! Her writing can be found in various online publications, including: Mamapedia, Scary Mommy, The Huffington Post, Mamalode, In the Powder Room, Pregnant Chicken, and Sweatpants & Coffee.
When Kristen Mae isn’t running absurdly long distances, washing poop out of her dog’s butt-hair, or taming her two booger-machines, she’s tossing her expensive master’s of music performance degree out the window by feverishly attacking her “writing career.” Kristen is the voice of Abandoning Pretense, where she tells the whole, uncensored truth about marriage, parenthood, and life. In addition to her blog, Kristen shares hilarious and heart-warming tidbits of her life on her Facebook page, Google+, Twitter and Pinterest, and is also a regular contributor at ScaryMommy.com, Mamapedia.com and Mamalode.com.
Jill writes about adoption, motherhood and midlife on her blog Ripped Jeans and Bifocals.
She has a degree in social psychology that she uses to try and make sense out of the behavior of her husband and three children but it hasn't really helped so far. She enjoys dry humor and has a love/hate relationship with running. Her writing has also been featured on Huffington Post, Babble, Scary Mommy, In the Powder Room, and Mamalode. Jill is a BlogHer 2015 Voice of the Year and willingly answers any questions that end with “and would you like wine with that?” Hang out with Jill on Facebook. and Twitter.
Mother of two daughters, Doom and Destruction, Alison Huff is an artist and writer who lives a country bumpkin life with her family in bipolar northeastern Ohio. A lover of lapsang souchong tea, unnaturally-colored hair, and Oxford commas, her stories are written with a signature blend of humor and brutal honesty. An essayist for anthologies and websites that strike her fancy, Alison is a member of Hearst Digital Media’s contributor network, The Mix, and she is a purveyor of satire at MockMom.com because the world can never have too much laughter. If you’ve enjoyed reading her work on BLUNTmoms, you can read more on her blog, Please Stop Putting Crackers Down My Shirt. (She is one wordy bitch, so don’t say I didn’t warn you.)
A twelve year veteran in the mother industry, Julie has recently added writer to her resume. In addition to a full time job, she is part time taxi driver, laundry folder, booger picker, and wine connoisseur. She has a Masters in Psychology which has proved useless in trying to understand her preteen daughter. She lives in Minnesota with her husband, 3 children, and ever growing tribe of pets. She has the attention span of a gnat, zero sense of direction and loses at least 3 things every day. Except for a minor situation at a county fair, her children are not on the short list of items she’s lost. She is extremely proud of this. You can find her writing on anothermotherblog.com, on Facebook at facebook.com/anothermotherblog or Twitter @74amb. She has been published on Scary Mommy, BLUNTmoms, The Mid, among others and is a contributor to TODAY Show Parenting Team.
Kristine Laco shares the stories we all have with a splash of sarcasm, a pinch of bitch and a ton of wine. Her middle finger is her favourite and she lives by the motto that if you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them. She takes selfies at the gyno. Taco Tuesday is her gospel. Reality TV is real folks. One day Kristine aspires to be a good blogger at www.mumrevised.com. By her calculations to get to 10,000 hours at 2-3 posts/week at 1.5 hours per post for 52 weeks a year she will be good at it in 53 years. Stick with her. It will be worth it.
Jessica is a wannabe urban homesteader, living in Portland with her blended family of 4 kids, 3 rescue dogs and 4 chickens named after Starbucks drinks. A former pharmacy student, Jessica decided she like baking better than drugs so went to pastry school instead. Described by her friend as a "Feminist Jedi Master", Jessica can be found spreading 'peace and wisdom' over at her blog, The Dalai Mama, at www.travelingmercies-jessica.blogspot.com
Sarah writes with sarcasm about science, gender, feminism and fertility issues on her blog sarahanngilbert.com. She is writing a memoir about her experience becoming a parent. Sarah lives in Denver with her wife, two girls and an ungrateful dog. If she had more free time, she would spend it lobbying the state government to make down vests and flip-flops the official uniform of Colorado. You can talk to her on Twitter @sarahanngilbert.
Melissa Morritt Coble
Melissa Coble is a mom living in Phoenix, Arizona just
trying to survive the teenage years with a lot of laughs,
an occasional rant, and copious amounts of wine. You can
find her counting the days until her nest is empty on her blog An Unfit Parent and on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.
Ashley Alteman is known for her love of dinosaurs, ponies wearing sweaters, and overuse of commas. She is an editor’s nightmare. She won a spelling bee in the 8th grade for correctly spelling “carrot” and knew from that moment she was destined to be an amazing journalist, or a sarcastic blogger; she went with the latter. Ashley details her laugh-out-loud parenting and personal fails at SmashleyAshley.com. You can also find this hot mess fumbling around on Facebook
Carrie is stumbling through life trying to raise two kids, three dogs, and a hamster. By day, she’s a cubicle jockey, and by night she morphs into her alter ego, a hilarious mom blogger who enjoys wine, writing, and song. In addition to writing for BLUNTmoms, Carrie has been a contributor for Mamapedia, Mamalode, and the anthologies Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee and Surviving Mental Illness Through Humor.
Jill is a seeker, writer and blurter of truth. She is a top-notch Vagina Evangelist, wife to a hoarder of camping gear and mother to 2 girls, 2 dogs and a cat who's been perilously close to death for several years now. From wildly comedic to tear-dripping serious, you can find her stories on her blog, Totally Inappropriate Mom, where her 'life-uncensored' philosophy, naughty humor and general inappropriateness run the show.
Alison Tedford is a freelance writer and mommy blogger from Abbotsford, BC. She documents her journey in feminism, fitness and parenting on Sparkly Shoes and Sweat Drops.
Pam is a Vancouver-based mother of two who writes with honesty, humor & hope about her post-wife life at divorcedoula.me After working through a difficult separation and divorce. she now enjoys a enlightened co-parenting relationship with her former husband. She started DivorceDoula.me to share her experiences and resources with others who may be going through a separation or divorce of their own.
Maureen lives outside Washington DC with her husband, 3 boys and her dog, the only one who really understands her. She shamelessly exploits the chaos of her everyday life for enjoyment and profit. She loves 80's music, Miller Lite and reality TV. She is rarely without a koozie in case someone is kind enough to offer a beverage. Maureen can be found blogging at Montgomery Community Media, in her column for the Town Courier Newspapers as well as online at Scary Mommy, the Mid and more.
Glynis Ratcliffe used to be an opera singer, but after her daughter begged her to stop singing and be quiet for the millionth time, she decided to use her inside voice and write instead. Now she spends her time writing on her blog, The Joy of Cooking (for Little Assholes), about the important things in life, like potty training, eating too much Nutella and laughing at how ridiculous her kids are. You can find her writing on Scary Mommy, The Huffington Post and The Mid, as well.
Ali Solomon is an art teacher and cartoonist who lives in NYC with her husband and two toddler daughters. She likes to draw cartoons of babies. Sometimes babies draw cartoons of her. You can find her on the Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, NickMom, In the Powder Room, and numerous other parenting sites. Read more of her ridiculous nonsense at http://wiggleroomblog.com or @Alicoaster.
Jennifer Scharf is a freelance writer with essays featured in McSweeney’s, Scary Mommy, Mamalode, The Mid, BLUNTmoms and more. You can follow her on Facebook and Twitter.
Peyton Price is the author of Suburban Haiku: Poetic Dispatches From Behind The Picket Fence. You can find her making pathetic excuses in social situations and at suburbanhaiku.com.
Emily is a Pac-NW based mom to one, and an almost mom to another who is scheduled to arrive sometime in early 2016. She thinks she is funny, but in actuality is just really good at making people feel awkward and uncomfortable. She documents her shenanigans and musing on her blog Hold Me, Don't Hold Me, which was once mentioned on the local news as being "slightly humorous." WINNING! Her work can also be found on Scary Mommy, Mamapedia, Pregnant Chicken, MockMom and of course BLUNTMoms. She can be found on Facebook and Twitter.
Nancy, a corporate public relations professional by day, navigates motherhood, some days better than others, under the aging 1930s roof of a teenager, a husband 14 years her senior, two hound dogs and her own midlife perimenopausal madness.