If you are as sensitive as I am, you will probably feel like this post was written about you. And, for once, you would be right. It was written about you . . . and me, and all the other overly-sensitive made-of-glass people stumbling around out there trying to reign in all their stupid feelings.
20 Signs You Might Be a Little Too Freakin’ Sensitive (like me)
1) On Facebook, you can’t help but notice when a friend of yours likes everyone’s comment but yours, and it hurts your feelings. You could mope about this for days. (“Why does Jane not like me anymore? Did I DO something??” *sob!*)
2) You understand that it is possible – probable, even – to have a nervous breakdown over a book.
3) Or freak the hell out over some music.
4) That person who broke your heart a million years ago? Why? What did you do wrong? Are you not loveable? Why the dreams? Can we maybe stop with the dreams?
5) You know that any time after 11:00 p.m. there is a high probability that there is either a serial killer, a zombie or an alien outside of your window. Likewise, you can turn any ordinary nighttime house sound into the sound of a killer coming down your hallway to murder you while you lay frozen in panic.
6) You wonder all the time why people are so mean. Why can’t we all just be nice to each other?
7) You can’t believe that there are people on this earth who don’t like dogs. Like, are they just not paying attention?
8) Shows like Breaking Bad, The Sopranos and Orange is the New Black are just “too much” for you.
9) You say sorry all the time. When someone says, “Don’t be sorry!” you respond with, “Oh. Sorry.”
10) When instant messaging with a friend, if you see the little dots indicating a forthcoming message, but then the message never comes, you immediately assume the person thinks you cannot be trusted with secrets. And you will literally wonder until the day you die what they were about to say.
11) You always let people go ahead of you. You’re that person at the grocery store checkout who insists, “No, you go. No really. You first. PLEASE.” If you end up going first because the other person wouldn’t relent, you feel like a dirty thief for the rest of the day.
12) People are always telling you, “Don’t be so sensitive!”
13) You’re pretty sure that weird thing you said three weeks ago at your kid’s open house has marked you as a social pariah. Especially because that one popular mom never looks you in the eye anymore.
14) It honestly hurts your feelings when your husband starts eating before you’ve even gotten your plate. (“Doesn’t he even NOTICE I’M ALIVE?”)
15) Post-it notes and lists EVERYWHERE because you forgetting something will definitely be a catalyst for the apocalypse.
16) If you wake up in the morning from a disturbing dream, it will ruin your whole day.
17) If you make a mistake at work, you fret about what a moron you are for at least three weeks.
18) Sometimes you ugly cry in the shower because the world is just such a beautiful disaster.
19) If someone tries to tickle you, you will not hesitate to kick them in the junk. But it will be by accident, and you will feel terrible about it later.
20) This list is making you feel terribly emotional. (Sorry.)
Eh? Sound familiar? Now do you feel validated but also sort of like someone just ripped off your top layer of skin and now all your nerves are exposed and everything’s all tingly and you can’t tell if that’s a good thing or a bad thing? It’s okay. I understand. Let’s internet-hug.
Now there. Isn’t that better?
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